Disclaimer...this post is in no way written to garner sympathy from you, but hopefully a way for the fog I'm in to lift.
A week ago this morning at 5:11, our house phone rang. We failed to get to the phone in time, but did not need to wonder who was calling as my cell phone rang seconds after. I keep my phone with me at night..cuz' I'm a mother and my adult kids no longer live with us. If there is an emergency they know to call me. I'm not even sure they know our land line number!
That Wednesday morning many lives were forever altered as a beloved wife, mother, grandmother and dearest friend took the hand of her Lord and walked into eternity. Looking back, by the time Rob and I threw on clothes and ran down the hill to the home of Pastor Brian, our associate pastor, his wife of 44 years Barb, was probably gone. We didn't have to wonder what had happened as we entered the house to go upstairs and weep with those who were weeping. So began the descent into the valley of the shadow of death. I wish I could write about every emotion I have felt since then, but elaborating on emotions that still surface too easily will have to wait for another day. I'm still hoping writing will help. Not only has a husband lost part of himself, children lost a mother who loved them 110% and grandchildren have lost a doting grandmother, Lafayette Alliance Church has lost too. In years past, I have asked myself why we use the word "loss" or "lost" when someone passes away. I am reminded again, the loss is ours...and the loss is great.
In the coming days or weeks, I will tell you about the best kind of friend a girl could have. For now, let me say, she was an example of how to love. She didn't gossip and she did not criticize those I love the most. I knew Barb was always looking out for me in the good and the bad, she was a trusted friend whom I loved.
Today the distractions of daylight help, but when I close my eyes, the darkness reveals the face of someone who was closer than a brother(sister). (Proverbs 18:24)